Synergy

And it ended.

=(

I miss everything about it already. The feeling on stage, the preparations, the private concert and sing along session in LT4, the "Mission Impossible III", the crazy photo shoots, the unison of music, the group of us which really got together only on that day (it is a pity it didn't happen earlier), everything, everything, everything.

Poignant Anticipation

I guess one just can't express in too many different forms at the same time. For the past few weeks, it has taken place in the form of music. =)

Yesterday was the last guitar practice for J2s. I think i'm the only oddball who will miss such practice sessions so much. While my other friends were dreading that their ccas will only end around June, I am dreading that mine ended so fast. Just as i began to really feel passionate for guitar ensemble about a month ago, it is going to end soon. Life is always about imperfections huh? Yet, it is these imperfections which will make memory everlasting and beautiful.

Today is Friday. Tomorrow will be Synergy. All the hard work put in by everyone will be rewarded tomorrow with boundless sense of satisfaction and perhaps relief. As little a part an individual can play in this concert, it takes every single one's effort to paint the big picture. I am anticipating the masterpiece, yet, there is this poignant melancholy surrounding the anticipation. Wells, perhaps it is silly to dread that something will end before it had even begun. Heh..Yups, so i shall enjoy the present to the fullest!

May Synergy 2006 to be a great success! =D

Publicity...

Synergy 2006 - Colours of the World

29th April at NYJC

Martinee Show: 1230h

Evening Show: 1900h

Tickets at $10 each

This concert is a combined concert of all the performing arts groups in NYJC. Some of the groups include choir, chinese ochestra, band, guitar, dance and so much more... There will also be performances by some very talented singers and performers who just come together for the genuine love of music. Trust me, the performances will be good, and it is defintely worth all the time and money invested. Interested parties please look for me. =)

Music!

The past few days had been euphoric for me. Totally immersed in the overwhelming sensation which music brings. This fanatic craze with new age, contemporary classical music. Suddenly artistes like John Williams, Danny Wright and Kevin Kern occupied my entire playlist. I guess I have to thank Kevin(not Kern. lol) for introducing me into the enchanting world of contemporary classical music. It all started with the beautiful guitar piece of Cavatina which was splendidly performed, then it was the mp3 of Danny Wright's Spring, and the next day, Kevin passed me the score for Sundial Dreams. And my journey into this realm of music is irreversible. But I don't mind at all, in fact, I'm almost prancing every single step with euphoria. =)

There are such strong inspirations for me to implore further, to elevate my skills to a higher level. To go beyond pop songs, to go beyond the mundane C major, or even G major and F major for that matter. (Sundial Dreams is in Gb major - it has 6 flats mind you. =P) Last year, Mona gave me so much inspiration by encouraging me to pursue a higher level, and told me that self-taught musicians can be as well as or even better than those who been through formal lessons. Although she herself is a fantastic pianist with formal training, she told me of great examples of people who succeeded despite all odds. But Kevin is the person who let me see for myself, the potentials of learning an instrument all by yourself. No doubt the rigor and discipline will have to come from self, yet isn't that more laudable? To have a strong enough passion and drive to discipline yourself to achieve such soaring standards.

I believe that the genuineness of passion is greater and more important than any certificates or grades.

Music Culture in Singapore

Chanced upon this wonderfully written blog, and this entry caught my eye. How i agree with the author! http://heavenly-sword.blogspot.com

If we start gathering statistics on the number of Singaporeans who have 'officially' learnt piano, I am quite sure that the statistics will be rather impressive. In Singapore, learning piano is part of the culture among a sizable portion of the middle-class! So the question I've been asking myself is: are Singaporeans really so musically inclined? Do we really have so many aspiring Melvyn Tan's? Do we truly love piano music so much?

From what I've observed over the years, in Singapore, piano learners are not really learning the instrument out of true love for it. Most of the learners are really young when their parents find piano teachers for them, and many of them seriously wish to give up this time-consuming 'extra-curricular activity' when they reach their teenage years, when their schoolwork gets more harrowing and their interest in the instrument wanes. Unfortunately, these parents do not really care whether their children like the piano or not. In fact, they don't care at all! But they will still force their children to go through this ritual for several reasons.

Firstly, many of them have not had the chance to learn the piano when they were young. Chinese cultures all over the world are like that: the older generation will always try to make the younger generation do what they had wanted to do in their time but did not get the chance to. Secondly, the piano is an instrument with 'class', so learning it confers some of the associated prestige to the family that has a child learning it, regardless of the reason for learning it or the actual capabilities of the 'pianist within the family'. Parents are usually quite proud when their kids practise the piano, since the neighbours can certainly hear the piano music which is quite loud compared to the music produced by other instruments. Even if the guitar were to have equal prestige as piano, people will probably still choose piano, because the latter can be heard much more clearly and thus the family does not need to go out of the way to 'advertise' that fact to the neighbours. It is not 'music' that the family-with-piano prizes, but the 'face' or 'mianzi' that this activity confers that it is attempting to gain...

But parents are not entirely to be blamed. Another reason why I think that piano learners in Singapore are not truly passionate about piano is that they can't be! The piano-education system here is flawed, for it mirrors the education system in general in terms of its exam focus. In Singapore, the ultimate credentials-focused society in the world, piano learning has mutated from a leisurely activity done out of musical appreciation into a stressful activity done out of the motivation to collect yet another certificate. Someone I know once told me that the reason why he wants his children to learn piano is that they can have an additional skill to make a living if the economy is not doing well. Gosh!

The focus is on passing exams of one grade after another, all the way to Grade 8 or even Diploma (LTCL, ARCM, etc). With this kind of focus, it's not surprising that the child's love for the music is eventually knocked out by the boring exam pieces, the 'scales', and other exercises that the child has to master in order to pass the exams. The compulsory Baroque piece that one has to play at every grade (for example, J.S. Bach, Haydn, Handel, etc) is usually not melodious at all, and certainly a great pain to practise (unfortunately, the two other pieces of different genres are usually not the nicest-sounding pieces in the world either, unless one is extremely lucky). And having to practise two to three uninspiring and not-exactly-melodious pieces daily after many tiring hours at school can really drive a teenager crazy.

It's also hard to find a stimulating piano teacher in Singapore. Many are teaching piano for the money, not out of real love for imparting this art to the children. Of course, they are probably also disillusioned after seeing so many disinterested children who have been 'forced' to learn the piano by their parents. How many will actually teach beyond the exam syllabus of the Associated Board of the Royal Schools of Music (ABRSM)? Not many will, I reckon. And it's not surprising because I would do the same too if I were in their situation, having to face the pragmatic parents who will scream should their precious and obviously 'talented' child fail the exam ("What?! I'm paying you so much money every month and he can't even pass his exam?? Then why are you wasting his time by teaching him these pieces which are not in 'the syllabus'?!").

Thus, the piano culture in Singapore is warped. It's parents-driven, exams-focused, and certificate-oriented. Perhaps parents should seriously consider thrice before insisting that their children learn the instrument, or let the children decide for themselves when they are older (say, 11-12 years old). It's really a heavy commitment in terms of finances, time, and energy. It may be cool to boast to your friends that your child can play the piano, but if you really think about it, despite the tens of thousands of dollars spent on learning the instrument, how many people with the Grade 8 certificate actually do continue playing it when they have crossed all the hurdles? Isn't it a waste to learn the piano if one stops playing it immediately after passing all the exams? Isn't it silly to play nothing but the exam pieces for 10 years of one's piano education? This reflects a mentality that is antithetical to the spirit of music learning. Somehow, I feel that Singapore's culture of pragmatism is so pervasive that no area of activity is spared. So the piano, despite all its beauty, similarly denegerates and mutates into a torturous tool for social comparison, prestige enhancement, authoritarian exercise of parental power, and credentialling for an uncertain economy. Which is sad, really......

Maintenance of Friendships

Written 2 March 2006

A few days ago i was thinking about this, but didnt get to pen it down.. i was revaluating the friendships i have. People whom i used to consider close and dear to me, are they still as close or as dear now? Time awashes everything, that i understand. But are our friendships so easily washed away and diminished because of time? I am not asking for these bonds to last forever, and i know reality doesn't allow that to happen either. But sometiems the idealist in me just wonders, what weight do those friends carry in my heart now?

Relationships of all kinds, requires constant nurturing. Tending to a relationship is like growing a pot of flowers. You need to constantly nourish it with water and fertilizers, need to weed out the ills and eliminate whatever pests eating up your plant. You need to give it ample sunlight so that it would grow, give it enough care and concern so that buds will emerge, and beautiful flowers bloom.

Relationships, like communication, are never one-way. It takes the efforts of both or more parties to make it work. I always believed that good relationships don't just come by, you have to work to make it good. Now, i think back on those friends whom i used to cry to, whine to, those friends whom knew me inside out and bothered to understand me, they are the ones who have seen my best and worst. What are their positions in my heart now? Have i at least worked my part to maintain them? Have they also, put in the effort?

As much as i really want to keep them there, as much as i treasure them, it seems like, there are other things in my life which gradually overtook their significance in my life. And it pains me so.

Ironic huh.

Its as if circumstances forced me to "abandon" them, but the truth is, i havent been working on it either. But when i look back and there are subtle traces of regret, its too late to reconnect that half broken wire.

Somethings, once faded, never comes back again.

Its not a question of blame. Its a question of the heart.

Although we might have drifted apart, and things will never go back to where it was, but i'll never forget times when they've helped me so much, pulling me out of darkness and facing the grey clouds with me.

I used to be able to promise that i'll be there for you. But now, its not even whether my promise still stands.. It is whether you would still come to me. I guess, this problem is true for me too. I don't want to make a promise that i know i won't have the opportunity to fulfil. Neither do i want you to do the same.

But all i can say is that, life is never too busy for good ole friends.

Castles in the air

Perhaps its time to be more current. All my previous posts had been of an esoteric and philosophical nature that i do feel that i'm building castles in the air. However... since i'm not really in a mood to write, pictures! =)



They are mainly taken on my recent trips with my bike, with the exception of the Awards and Promos of course. Sunset from ECP and the beautiful Clark Quay. Finally passed by the (in)famous Crazy Horse (bottom right, its a strip club, btw). Aniwaez at the top centre, beautiful bridge isn't it? There is a similar one in Kallang, but that one is all white and classy. And at the bottom left, that's my good ole mate! Taken against a stretch of bicycle track in ECP which was mysteriously blacked out.

Change

Sometimes change is the way to keep things the same.

When two people started off as friends, perhaps it is a parallel line. But when one progresses in life faster than the other, the lines may diverge. When that happens, it is not easy to converge again anymore. Sometimes, there comes a point of time whereby the differences are simply too great to reconcile. As you look back, you may find that you have changed and grown so much, yet the other had stayed the same.

Some friends want to stay exactly the way when they first started off their friendship. Even as they change over time, when around each other, they will revert back to their old selves just to keep things the same. They don't wish to show each other that they have changed, because they are afraid tha the friendship may change too. Yet many a times, is that not a facade? The resistance to change only exacerbated the process.

Perhaps a way for long term friendships is to accept each other's change, at the same time, it is equally important to recognise that you have changed too.

It is saddening to see that sometimes, one has changed yet the other has stayed constant. The former would only diverge further and further away from the latter.

In pursue of the arts and humanities

There has always been this unspoken, understated allure of the arts and humanities that i could never be able to express well enough. "Why do you study the arts?" is a question i get asked rather often. Out of convenience i'll just say, "Oh, cos i really love it." So what do i love of it?

My Chinese teacher once said that studying the humanities will make a person more sensitive and aware of the people and situation around. Humanities are essentially the study of human behaviour in special circumstances, or even just everyday life. History follows the ideologies and actions of mankind, literature involves the dissecting of human thought, geography studies role of people in environment, etc etc. But somehow, the intrigue of the humanities is still vague. So what is so great about doing all that?

Today, the answer chanced upon me. Thanks to Xin Hui, who expressed it succintly. Studying the humanities open new perspectives to life. Yes, that is so right! Isn't it all what the humanities are about? Life!

The humanities reflect ambiguities and paradoxes of life. There can never be one straight route any destination, and there are limitless destinations. Answers can never be absolutely correct or wrong, and not every question is meant to be answered. Every action is never formed by a parachiol intention, and not all consequences of the actions are just how it was expected to be. Nothing is absolutely black and white, and every conclusion is just a personal interpretation.

These subtleties in life are well reflected in the humanities. They always say that in a college, the arts students are usually the more vibrant bunch. Perhaps an explanation would be that, in the study of the humanities, realisation of life makes living it more interesting.

As for me, living life itself is the meaning for my existence. As silly as it may sound, think about this. How many people actually could say that they have truly lived life? How many people could actually even be close to fully comprehend the complexities and ambiguities of life? I aim not to become a philosopher nor an ideologist, i aim not to influence humanity nor write history. I just want, as much as i can, to understand the broad spectrum of life and form my own perspectives.

Perhaps that is prime reason for my passion for the arts and the study humanities. It is in pursue of these areas that i could seek to understand life better, and to open up new perspectives to how i live.

Despite the beauty of the subject matter itself, our educational system is still something which we have to circum to. Tests, exams, and all the practicalities of schooling could diminish the interest to some extent. In the controlled environment of secondary schools and junior colleges, the true depth and breadth of humanities could never be explored enough. There is just so much out there, awaiting our discovery.

I do feel a little sad sometimes, for how the humanities subjects are being treated in schools. Teachers with such a wonderful depth of knowledge and fresh perspectives, yet could not afford to share because of the practicalities of rushing the syllabus and meeting the examinations "quota". The arts and humanities have such flexible content and approach to studying them, yet to meet exams expectations, shortcuts and tested-and-proven methods have to be enforced on students. Then again, it is probably not worth putting the blame on anything. Our nation is build on pragmatism, and we won't be where we are if not for this principle. Thankfully, the trend is changing, abeit rather sluggishly.

Perhaps it really takes a great deal of passion of individuals to continue to pursue a seemingly impractical arena of the humanities. Yet, the joy and fulfilment of this process could only be understood by those who are willing to go through it. =)